Boom goes the television

I admit it. I am one of the 17 people on the planet who knows what Pants Off Dance Off is [Tagline: This is your brain on pause]. I won't say I watch it, but it does logically follow that I'm also one of the 41 people who know what FUSE TV is (no link. I refuse.) In fact, I'm listening to it right now. There's a song by a band who apparently just found the vocoder function in their recording studio.

And you know what? I miss Jodie Sweetin. She was so endearing as the grown up (and I mean grown up: I don't know if I miss her or her rack) member of the Tanner family. And thinking about her makes me wonder, "What happened to the Tanners?"

• Bob Saget: Does that 1 vs 100 show and the voiceover for How I Met Your Mother. Also, a dirty dirty man.
• John Stamos: Convinced Rebecca Romijn to change her name. Then Jake in Progress. Both surprising accomplishments, yet I remain unswayed.
• Dave Coulier: Let's be honest - Dave Coulier's moment was Out of Control. America's Funniest People? Never happened (proof: no link). Though there's a rumor that he dated/had crazy illegal sex with an underage Alanis Morrisette, causing her to write "You Oughta Know". If true, that definitely tops OOC.
• Candace Cameron: Married a hockey player (hold on, I'm coming back to this). I think Valeri Bure, but it could have been Pavel. And I'm not looking it up, because I have too many links already. Anyways, she's a mom now. Good for her.
• Olsen twins: Have consumed 11000 calories since 1997. Seriously, I'm impressed.
• Lori Loughlin: One of those really attractive women who was in one thing and disappeared. Like the girlfriend from Ferris Bueller. And yes, I'm counting In Case of Emergency as continued disappearance.
• Jodie Sweetin: Mom. PODO second season host. Replaced by Willa Ford. Yeah, I hadn't heard of her either. But apparently Willa's marrying Mike Modano. And a pop star. And got her name from a mispronunciation of Fred Flinstone's wife. ("Willa"? That's not a word!)
  

OK, so my thoughts on PODO and FUSE are just gonna have to wait. But this first post could have gone worse.